Is that an Oxymoron?

I was looking for some new music and came across this article and really liked it and thought I should share since it's basically what my blog is all about.

According to some critics and cynics, the words Christian and hardcore become an oxymoron when linked together. At their association, images of loud music, yelling, moshing, and, most of all, apparent anger become tangible reflections. But is this appropriate?

"They sound so angry," a friend said to me once while I was playing Grammatrain, a now defunct Christian rock band who are, by coincidence, not so heavy. "If they're filled with the love of God, why are they so angry?"

Grammatrain is, by far, not the most brutal of the genre. Whenever I play Zao or Living Sacrifice albums in the presence of friends and comment on the music's Christianity, their brows furrow as deep as the dunes along this Carolina coast.

"I just have one question," I was asked recently while playing "Desire the End" from Zao's 1999 release, Liberate Te Ex Inferis. "What is he saying?"

It is true that we, as Christians, often disregard exactly what we're doing as long as we're told it's Christian. Music is as fine an example as any.

As in much hardcore, whether Christian or secular, some of the Christian bands making the rounds are mostly indiscernible as far as their lyrics are concerned, Zao, Living Sacrifice, early Embodyment, and Overcome not the least of those. If it is impossible for me to hear the message, does that make it no longer Christian or even positive?

I've been asked over and over why I listen to Christian hardcore. No matter my response, their conclusion is they don't agree with it, no matter where their faith lies. Christian hardcore is a ministry meant more for recruitment than strengthening. While someone already deeply rooted in the Christian faith may not gain much from the messages in the lyrics of Zao or Living Sacrifice, one who does not yet know God may learn more than they ever thought they could know.

A Christian hardcore concert is, while being much the same, an opposite from your typical secular show. While moshing and shouting may still persist, and while violent rhythms and burning guitars may still burrow through the crowds' hearing like flesh-eating earwigs, there is also an air of holiness about the place. There is ministry performed by the band members between songs, and there is an effort to "lift up your brother, don't put him down," as P.O.D. says to their fans when the mosh pit breaks open as violently as a Northeastern storm cloud in front of their stage. A hardcore Christian concert is all about enjoying music and praising God, as well as trying to bring those who are in the hardcore scene and thus most detached from God closer to His will.

I read a review on CDNow.com recently of Zao's Where Blood and Fire Bring Rest LP. They described Zao's message as "holy/evil." If critics are confusing the Christian hardcore scene to such an extent, it is time that we Christians stand up and proclaim the benefits of these holy messages, no matter how muddled they may be within all the distorted noise.

There will remain those who disagree with this approach to bringing in lost children/young adults who frequent the hardcore and punk clubs. There will remain friends in my life who will scold some of my more disturbing Christian CDs. There may even be those who will lose respect for me because of the brand of music I listen to. As far as I'm concerned, God is the One who introduced me to this music and it is a strong stream of ministry. Do not compromise your faith for the warnings of those less holy than yourself. Take it up with God. And rock on.

I won't Breakdown

This morning I was running a little late to school but finally got in my car and drove away. I had my music on and my windows cracked but all of a sudden I hear this loud grinding, sputtering, rattling noise. I figure I must have run over some cardboard and it was stuck or something.

So I pull over, haven't even made it a mile from my house so I'm still in neighborhood area, turn the car off and get out and check for the source of the noise. Unfortnately I see nothing so I decide to start my car, maybe the noise went away. Of course it did not. Being the very intelligent person that I am I cannot even figure out how to pop the hood, I know very intelligent.

So I call my mom to see if she has some brilliant advice for me, she doesn't answer. I call my dad surely he will have advice or something, he doesn't answer. I try everyone again 3 more times but still no freaking answer. I give up and stare at my car for a minute hoping to magically wish the evil noise from it. Give up on that and try my mom again, this time she answers, yes! Being just as intelligent as me she has no idea what to do but says she'll come pick me up and then I can drive her home and take the mom-mobile to school, great.

I have to say that going from awesome ipod capable, sunroof, spiffy car, to kid toting, oldies listening, mom-mobile was not fun. But I finally get to Chantilly like 45 minutes late, not too worried about the time cause my teacher's cool and it was a grooming day in my academy. I go to park in my spot, and how wonderful a very nice person decided to conserve parking space and park in my spot, how nice. So now I have to go park in visitors which is nowhere close to my class.

I park and finally get to the doors, one doesn't open, second doesn't open, none of them open, what the crap its a school not a prison. I have to now walk further to another set of doors, luckily those open. Since the very nice person had parked in my spot I have to go to the security office, which by the way is on the other side of the school. Of course with my luck so far the door is closed and locked. This has happened before so I know to go to the academy office, on the other side of school where I just came from. All they do is write my name and spot number down and tell me someone will "do something." Very Encouraging.

I get to class, by now I've missed more than half of it, and my teacher doesn't even realize I haven't been there, grooming days are hectic. So I just join a group and start working on a dog. Everything actually goes normal with that and we finish up and leave. Halfway to my car on the other side of the building I realize I was supposed to get a form signed by my teacher so I can go on a field trip. Go back and get the form signed, and finally get in the mom-mobile and head to fairfax.

I get there and head to class and of course get stopped by security wondering what I'm doing, even though they see me everyday, I guess I looked guilty or something today. The rest of the morning goes normal I guess. Then I get to pre-calc, always a fun class, not. I realize that I left my homework in my car, on the side of the road, wonderful. We also had a quiz today, which I actually did semi good on, and think my day is starting to look up. Then my teacher hands back our tests from a week prior, and I recieve the wonderful grade of F. Great.

I give up and head to Fashion Design which always cheers me up, at least a little. However, today we were learning about the parts of a sewing machine and sewing basics. I could probably write the machine manual and teach the class basics so I was bored out of my mind, but it's only and hour and a half til schools out so I push through.

Driving home I got green lights all the way wooo. When I get home my mom thinks we should go pick up my car. So we go get it and drive it home, its still making the funky noise but no lights are coming on and its not hot or anything so we park it in the garage and hope my dad can fix it. As I'm walking up the driveway, because I drove the van behind my mom, I see a trail of fluid and upon reaching the garage I realize it's oil and it's leaking bad, not just drops but a solid stream. I quickly grab the oil catch pan and stick it under the stream. Obviously this is no small problem.

As soon as I had heard the strange funky noise I immediately thought of the relient k song "Breakdown"

Oh, what a lousy excuse for a car
One mile to go, but i can't push it that far
I think i've had enough
I think i'm giving up

Saved all my money to buy a new guitar
Then i got ripped off by the guy who fixed my car
I think i've had enough
I think i'm giving up

Once again life's thrown me a curve, and it blew up right in my face
Once again life's rattled my nerves
Don't you see that i'm stuck in this place?

All because, you're giving me a ...breakdown
Stuck on the side of the road
Emotion over-load
He'll seek and destroy everything that i enjoy
But, i won't be the one he takes down
No, i won't breakdown


Even though I had a sucky day I tried to keep a good attitude cause what's the point of a sucky miserable day.

Music Player

Hey I got a music player thingy, obviously I don't know what to call it, so now you too can hear the cool music I write about :D
Listen, like it, love it

So Simple, but so Beautiful

Another song. Pretty much says it all

"I am Understood" by Relient K

Sometimes it's embarrassing to talk to you
To hold a conversation with the only one who sees right through
This version of myself
I try to hide behind
I'll bury my face because my disgrace will leave me terrified

And sometimes I'm so thankful for your loyalty
Your love regardless of
The mistakes I make will spoil me
My confidence is, in a sense, a gift you've given me
And I'm satisfied to realize you're all I'll ever need

[Chorus]
You looked into my life and never stopped
And you're thinking all my thoughts
Are so simple, but so beautiful
And you recite my words right back to me
Before I even speak
You let me know, I am understood

And sometimes I spend my time
Just trying to escape
I work so hard so desperately, in an attempt to create space
Cause I want distance from the utmost important thing I know
I see your love, then turn my back and beg for you to go

[Chorus]

You're the only one who understands completely
You're the only one knows me yet still loves completely

And sometimes the place I'm at is at a loss for words
If I think of something worthy I know that its already yours
And through the times I've faded and you've outlined me again
You've just patiently waited, to bring me back and then

[Chorus]

The noise has broken my defense
Let me embrace salvation
Your voice has broken my defense
Let me embrace salvation